Football patriotism

Filed Under Journal

Two posts on football in one day… we can expect hell to freeze over any moment now.

While I’m no fan of football (or any organised sport, really), the Euro 2008 championship has had one welcome side-effect: Germans are showing their true colours… literally. Everywhere you look, cars, windows and balconies are proudly adorned with German flags; this trend first surfaced during the World Cup in 2006, and has returned for Euro 2008.

In most countries this would be considered normal, especially in the United States where you can’t go anywhere without bumping into the Stars and Stripes. Due to their history, however, Germans are worried (read: paranoid) that any display of patriotism will be misinterpreted as nationalism, and that openly carrying a German flag is just one small step away from goose-stepping into neighbouring countries.

I’m pleased to see that sixty years and three generations after the end of World War II, Germans are finally daring to openly show they are proud to be German.

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Don’t mention the score!

Filed Under Journal

I find it strange how people can identify so strongly with a bunch of overpaid yobs kicking a ball around a field. I refer, of course, to the currently on-going 2008 UEFA European Football Championship. (That’s “soccer” for those on the other side of the pond.)

Sometimes, the enthusiasm and optimism of fans and the media borders on the psychotic. When Germany lost a first-round game against Croatia, the news reports consistently stated that “For the first time in this championship, Germany has lost a game.” They made it sound as if they had previously won dozens of games, when in fact this was just their second game. It doesn’t get much more glass-is-half-full-er than that. Luckily, they subsequently beat the Austrians, and so everything was once again fine in football world.

Incidentally, England didn’t even get through the qualifying round this time, so I can accurately brag that we have not lost a single game yet in this championship.

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German expressions #1

Filed Under German words

Like basically any language, German has a large number of phrases and expressions that sound a bit strange when you stop to ponder the bizarre sequence of words you just used.

For example, in English we might say “Ooh, he really put his foot in it” when somebody has said something unintentionally awkward or insulting. Germans as a highly scientific and literal people need more specifics; they need to know what “it” is. And so, the German version of the same phrase is “Ooh, he just stepped in a small dish of grease.”

In English-speaking countries, if someone is having a lousy day and is seemingly irritated for no reason, they probably “got out of bed on the wrong side”. Germans however “step out of bed with their left foot”. Alternatively, if their foul mood has nothing to do with their bed exit strategy, then maybe a “louse ran over their liver”.

In English, fads are considered the “latest craze”. In German, however, they are the “latest scream”. Evidently the English phrase was coined during the 1960s, where everything fashionable was inherently insane, while the German phrase is from… well, let’s not go there.

Other expressions lack an English equivalent, for example the deeply perplexing “Es zieht wie Hechtsuppe”. This phrase has to be the result of some dictionary author having a stroke at work; how else can we explain trying to say “It’s windy outside” with “The breeze out there is like pike soup”?

Some phrases might be blamed on the deeply militaristic history of Europe in general and Germany in particular. When a German wants to say “James overreacted”, they might instead choose to say “James was hunting sparrows with cannons”. When a German finally decides to give up on something, he “throws his rifle into the field”. In English, we “take someone for a ride”; Germans “aim their gun at you”. Ever since German soldiers got sick to death of practicing with their MG08/15 machine guns in the run-up to World War I, everyday boring things are called “08/15″.

And finally, instead of giving someone “their walking papers”, Germans tend to “send people into the desert”.

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The Daily WTF

Filed Under Amusing, Software development

Sweet Frith on the hills, how did I manage to overlook The Daily WTF for so long? This website is a gold mine chock full of hysterically funny, spine-chilling software development occurrences from real-life projects, all nicely wrapped in deeply sarcastic commentary.

For example, consider the following method:


public bool getIsNull (object obj) {
	return (obj==null);
}

Short. Simple. Tells the story.

However, while preparing the release of their product, management brought in a highly-paid consultant to refactor a load of code; during his efforts, he chanced upon the above method (and many like it), and decided to dump the old-fashioned == operator in favour of the much more enterprise-y .Equals method:


public bool getIsNull (object obj) {
	return obj.Equals(null);
}

I realise this is deeply, almost ludicrously nerdy, but that change had me weeping with laughter for a good ten minutes. Fellow coders will understand why.

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